Colum-bae

If everything in Cola got a Valentine’s Day card…

Happy Valentine’s Day, Cola. 💘 Remember way back when this day was simple? In elementary school you decorated a shoebox + collected paper cards from everyone in class. 💌 In middle school, you sent your friends those $1 roses or candy-grams sold in the cafeteria. 🌹 In high school, you low-key wished you were the person walking down the hall with that giant stuffed animal. In college, Valentine’s Day was just another made-up Hallmark holiday – so you went out and cheersed with your friends, instead. 🍷

But today, we’re throwing it back to the beginning. Colum-bae is our true love – so we’re handing out Valentine’s Day cards to all the things + places in Columbia that we adore so much. 💋 If this was real, here’s what we would drop in their pink + red bedazzled shoe boxes.

We just plane like you, CAE.

Thank you for keeping me grounded, Drip.

Dear Nightcaps mozz sticks: I know this is cheesy, but we think you’re grate.

Udon know how much I love you, Duke’s Pad Thai.

You improve our koal-ity of life, Riverbanks Zoo.

You make miso happy, Camon.

You put me in a surreal-estate of mind, The Moore Company.

Pawmetto Lifeline, can we be friends furever?

You’re my main squeeze, Southern Squeezed.

You Rock, Columbia Canal + Riverwalk.

Bill’s Pickin’ Parlor: We pick you.

You’re quite a catch, Columbia Fireflies.

Heroes in Blue, police be mine.

Nephron Pharmaceuticals, we think of you periodically.

You make me melt, Scoopy Doo Gelato in Five Points.

We have so mushroom in our hearts for you, City Roots.

We’re nuts about you, UofSC squirrels.

Let’s never put space between us, S.C. State Museum planetarium.

To: Lake Murray dam. Are you a beaver? ‘Cause dam.

I aorta tell you how much I love you, Lexington Medical Center.

Harbison State Forest, wood you be mine?

You’re right up our alley, The Grand.

Dear Lowes Foods Beer Den: Are you a keg? Because I’d tap that.

Let’s be blunt; weed be great together, S.C. hemp farming.

You’re my partner in wine, Vino Garage.

You’re puuuurfect for me, Cattitude Cat Cafe.

Us together makes a lot of cents, South State Bank.

Experience Columbia SC, our hearts burn for your city lights.

Not going to lie, this was probably the most fun I’ve had with a newsletter (for obvious reasons); literally chuckling to myself the entire time while writing these V-Day cards.

Moral of the story: I just really, really, really love you, Columbia.

–Sam